09.28.07 From the Vixen
Gizmos > I Hate Girl Toys
Written by Ashly Burch
An enraged exploration on the shallow, stereotype-perpetuating, mind-numbing market of children's (specifically girls') toys.
Allow me to paint a picture for you. It’s a Friday night at the local movie theater; a night designated for ladies and gentlemen over the age of fourteen to go see a film without parental accompaniment. Let us assume that you are in that rather forgiving age bracket, and are perhaps in the company of those of a similar physicality. When you arrive at said movie theater, quite enthralled to see, perhaps, Christian Bale and Russell Crowe shoot things, you find yourself stopping about ten yards short of the ticket booth; inexpressibly perplexed. You wonder if you took a wrong turn and accidentally drove into a middle school parking lot. Because, surely, why else would a hoard of prepubescent, scantily clothed girls hanging off their asshole boyfriends whose collective numbers and uniformity are reminiscent of a zombie movie be standing in your way of getting your goddamn movie ticket? You begin to wonder how this happened. How over the span of about two years this lovely little refuge became a breeding ground for, what seem to be, baby prostitutes. And you wonder, how the hell did they get it in their minds that this was the cool thing to do and the cool way to dress? Perhaps, you muse, they have an older sister. Or, wait, maybe it’s the fucking toys their parents bought them.
1.) Pixel Chix Love 2 Shop Mall
Not one, not two, but three red flags pop up when I see the name of this product. That’s just by the name alone, mind you. Pixel Chix? May I take a moment to express how unbelievably infuriated I am by the popularity of misspelling and shorthand that is prevalent in modern society today? Chix? Chix? Why, in the name of Christ, do toy designers (or anyone for that matter) think it’s a good idea to misspell shit? Why? Why, why, why, why, why? What if little girls actually think that’s the way it’s supposed to be spelled? And why is it “cool” to look like an idiot by spelling “chicks” with a fucking x? There is no reason. You know why? Because spelling things incorrectly isn’t fucking cool. It makes you look ignorant and you’re encouraging kids to look like morons too. And the 2! Is it really that labor intensive to spell out a two letter word? Oh no, but it’s cool to use numbers in place of words even when the words are two fucking letters long. Tlk 2 me, boi. How is that cool? How, in any way, shape, form, size, color, context, is that supposed to be cool? When I put these product names into Microsoft Word and I get four alerts that I’ve spelled something incorrectly, that makes me very unhappy. That depresses the shit out of me. I don’t think I’ve ever italicized or bolded so much in my entire life. The fury is unrestrainable. And we’re still not done.
Love 2 Shop Mall? Look, shopping is fine, I’m not against it as a general rule and I know it’s a coveted hobby for a lot of people, but of all the things to be attempting to engrain into the minds of little girls, is that really what we should be placing focus on? Encouraging them to enjoy spending money?
2.) Talking Bratz Cloe
Let me say, straight off the bat, how deeply I loathe the Bratz product line. The fact that it’s called “Bratz”; not just the z, but the “brat” part, denoting, as dictionary.com says, “an annoying, spoiled or impolite child”, is enough to make anyone cringe, but it’s the design of the dolls that I find most appalling. Barbie isn’t the greatest of role models, but at least her face doesn’t look like a poster girl for plastic surgery. The Bratz dolls, as you can see in the picture, have horrendously bloated lips that look like they’ve been injected with botox; eyes that are decidedly sensual and slathered in makeup; stick skinny physiques; big boots and feather boas. They look like they’re 17+ and are marketed to girls that are 10+. In fact, scratch that; they don’t even look an age. They look inhuman, and as these dolls serve as something of a basis for the girl’s perception of beauty, they’re compelled to think that they need to look and dress like that to be considered trendy or cool. It’s a bad, bad idea. And now there are even Baby Bratz who look like those horrifying child beauty pageant contestants except ten times worse. The fact that the franchise is coming out with a movie is just the icing on the cake; it’s bad enough seeing plastic look like this, now we’re going to see girls (girls, mind you), real girls, dressed up like they’re going for a night on the town and inspiring other girls to do the same.
But, oh, you can have a conversation with her? Well, that’s sort of interesting, maybe they’ll throw some insightful things in ther—nope. “Topics include boys, friends, fashion, and personality/style quizzes.” I’m so enthused that those are the only possible subjects that a girl cares to discuss. And that “fashion” is pretty much repeated with the mention of a “style” quiz. Emphasizing dress as a vehicle for acceptance is a great thing to imprint upon young, impressionable girls.
3.) Beauty Cuties Rockabelle Doll
Well, “Beauty Cuties” just tells you what you’re getting, doesn’t it? Beautiful, cute little dolls. Never mind that she looks like she’s twelve with thick makeup, a mini skirt and massive boots. That’s not too a too advanced or completely shallow representation of beauty for a young girl to take in. This is the product description: “Experts on everything beauty - Hair, Makeup or Fashion. Change their stylish look by ‘growing’ or ‘shortening’ their hair. Add funky hair extensions for cool looks. Pose their bodies dressed in edgy fashions to complete their fashion mission. Beauty is on Duty!”
Don’t get me wrong—I’m all for self expression. I think fashion is an oft used outlet for that. I find observing professional fashion interesting, and I believe it gives good insight to our current popular culture. What I don’t condone, however, is presenting a doll like this (which, by the way, there is absolutely nothing ‘edgy’ about her—there are people that dress exactly the same way on every campus in every state in the entire nation. And that further presses the notion of conformity upon a young girl who should be trying to learn to love herself as an individual that doesn’t fit into an easily defined category) and saying, “this is what ‘pretty’ looks like. She is fashionable and she is beautiful.” Personally, I don’t really like makeup, and I know I’ve talked to many people that feel the same way. And if you’re going to use it, then I think less is definitely more, but if you’re into the heavier stuff, that’s fine too. As long as it’s your choice and you think it looks good. These girls are being told that this is what is cool. There is something royally fucked about showing such a stereotypical (and in my opinion, flawed) representation of what is beautiful to a child; a young girl, who is forming her own opinions and trying to build her self-esteem along the way. And what’s with this die-hard emphasis on clothes and nonsense? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it as a general concept; I know people who are very passionate about it. But why in the world is that the subject that you really want to drive home to the female youth of today? The value of clothes! Ahh, how I revel only in my desire to look pretty. What a wonderful message to send. No wonder I see clones of this doll strutting pointlessly around my movie theaters.
4.) Little Mommy
Well, now that we’ve gotten the clothing/fashion stereotype out of the way, let’s move on to the other one: playing mommy. I understand; there are so many baby doll toys so that the little girl can be like her mommy and feel grown up like her mommy by taking care of a young one. But the daddy does that too, and you don’t see any baby toys geared toward little boys; that’s because taking care of a child has always been associated with the mother. Rightly so, to some degree, given that she births the damn thing, but it also contributes to that detrimental idea that all women have that motherly instinct and are expected to have and care for a child. This is why I like the musical instrument toys, or just regular looking dolls and stuffed animals that inspire you to be creative and imaginative (I always made up stories for my animals and dolls) and not pigeonhole you into a standard set specifically for your gender. Just like the Baby Born dolls (which are incredibly creepy, by the way; why the hell do you want a toy that could potentially pee on you), these Little Mommy Bath Baby dolls set up the notion of motherhood at a very young age, which I don’t think is a particularly good thing.
Again, I have absolutely nothing against children or motherhood, just like I don’t have anything against fashion or makeup or anything these dolls seem to advocate as a general rule. If you grow up and decide that you’re interested in having children; good for you. If you get into high school or college and discover that clothing and fashion is something that really interests you, I genuinely think that’s terrific. If you really enjoy wearing lots of makeup because you, as an individual, find it complimentary, knock yourself out. But why, I am compelled to ask, do toy manufacturers pump out doll after electronic device after plaything that only promote things that are stereotypically “womanly”? And why do we instill this notion of motherhood at such a young age? Isn’t that something that it’s generally a good idea to wait on? Being excited to be a parent is all well and good, but I really don’t think you should be encouraged to be pumped about it when you’re twelve.
5.) My Scene Fab Faces
Oh wait, just kidding, we’re not past the fashion bullshit yet. “The My Scene Fab Faces dolls are living the most fab, glamorous teenage life! Each doll has an, innovative, one-of-a-kind movable face feature that allows girls to create five different expressions on the dolls' faces: from frowns to smirks and smiles! Each doll comes with a super glam, ultra stylish lace and glitter dress and her outfit is topped off with accessories no diva can live without: a furry boa, a sparkling tiara, and glittering jewelry!”
Cool, so we only have five facial expressions as women.
Awesome, because teenage life is “fab” and “glamorous”
Right, because every girl I know has a furry boa, a sparkling tiara and glittering jewelry and they would literally die if they didn’t have those items in their possession.
Accurate, because I and all of my friends are super glam and ultra stylish.
Jesus. Just give these kids a book.
1.) Pixel Chix Love 2 Shop Mall
Not one, not two, but three red flags pop up when I see the name of this product. That’s just by the name alone, mind you. Pixel Chix? May I take a moment to express how unbelievably infuriated I am by the popularity of misspelling and shorthand that is prevalent in modern society today? Chix? Chix? Why, in the name of Christ, do toy designers (or anyone for that matter) think it’s a good idea to misspell shit? Why? Why, why, why, why, why? What if little girls actually think that’s the way it’s supposed to be spelled? And why is it “cool” to look like an idiot by spelling “chicks” with a fucking x? There is no reason. You know why? Because spelling things incorrectly isn’t fucking cool. It makes you look ignorant and you’re encouraging kids to look like morons too. And the 2! Is it really that labor intensive to spell out a two letter word? Oh no, but it’s cool to use numbers in place of words even when the words are two fucking letters long. Tlk 2 me, boi. How is that cool? How, in any way, shape, form, size, color, context, is that supposed to be cool? When I put these product names into Microsoft Word and I get four alerts that I’ve spelled something incorrectly, that makes me very unhappy. That depresses the shit out of me. I don’t think I’ve ever italicized or bolded so much in my entire life. The fury is unrestrainable. And we’re still not done.
Love 2 Shop Mall? Look, shopping is fine, I’m not against it as a general rule and I know it’s a coveted hobby for a lot of people, but of all the things to be attempting to engrain into the minds of little girls, is that really what we should be placing focus on? Encouraging them to enjoy spending money?
2.) Talking Bratz Cloe
Let me say, straight off the bat, how deeply I loathe the Bratz product line. The fact that it’s called “Bratz”; not just the z, but the “brat” part, denoting, as dictionary.com says, “an annoying, spoiled or impolite child”, is enough to make anyone cringe, but it’s the design of the dolls that I find most appalling. Barbie isn’t the greatest of role models, but at least her face doesn’t look like a poster girl for plastic surgery. The Bratz dolls, as you can see in the picture, have horrendously bloated lips that look like they’ve been injected with botox; eyes that are decidedly sensual and slathered in makeup; stick skinny physiques; big boots and feather boas. They look like they’re 17+ and are marketed to girls that are 10+. In fact, scratch that; they don’t even look an age. They look inhuman, and as these dolls serve as something of a basis for the girl’s perception of beauty, they’re compelled to think that they need to look and dress like that to be considered trendy or cool. It’s a bad, bad idea. And now there are even Baby Bratz who look like those horrifying child beauty pageant contestants except ten times worse. The fact that the franchise is coming out with a movie is just the icing on the cake; it’s bad enough seeing plastic look like this, now we’re going to see girls (girls, mind you), real girls, dressed up like they’re going for a night on the town and inspiring other girls to do the same.
But, oh, you can have a conversation with her? Well, that’s sort of interesting, maybe they’ll throw some insightful things in ther—nope. “Topics include boys, friends, fashion, and personality/style quizzes.” I’m so enthused that those are the only possible subjects that a girl cares to discuss. And that “fashion” is pretty much repeated with the mention of a “style” quiz. Emphasizing dress as a vehicle for acceptance is a great thing to imprint upon young, impressionable girls.
3.) Beauty Cuties Rockabelle Doll
Well, “Beauty Cuties” just tells you what you’re getting, doesn’t it? Beautiful, cute little dolls. Never mind that she looks like she’s twelve with thick makeup, a mini skirt and massive boots. That’s not too a too advanced or completely shallow representation of beauty for a young girl to take in. This is the product description: “Experts on everything beauty - Hair, Makeup or Fashion. Change their stylish look by ‘growing’ or ‘shortening’ their hair. Add funky hair extensions for cool looks. Pose their bodies dressed in edgy fashions to complete their fashion mission. Beauty is on Duty!”
Don’t get me wrong—I’m all for self expression. I think fashion is an oft used outlet for that. I find observing professional fashion interesting, and I believe it gives good insight to our current popular culture. What I don’t condone, however, is presenting a doll like this (which, by the way, there is absolutely nothing ‘edgy’ about her—there are people that dress exactly the same way on every campus in every state in the entire nation. And that further presses the notion of conformity upon a young girl who should be trying to learn to love herself as an individual that doesn’t fit into an easily defined category) and saying, “this is what ‘pretty’ looks like. She is fashionable and she is beautiful.” Personally, I don’t really like makeup, and I know I’ve talked to many people that feel the same way. And if you’re going to use it, then I think less is definitely more, but if you’re into the heavier stuff, that’s fine too. As long as it’s your choice and you think it looks good. These girls are being told that this is what is cool. There is something royally fucked about showing such a stereotypical (and in my opinion, flawed) representation of what is beautiful to a child; a young girl, who is forming her own opinions and trying to build her self-esteem along the way. And what’s with this die-hard emphasis on clothes and nonsense? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it as a general concept; I know people who are very passionate about it. But why in the world is that the subject that you really want to drive home to the female youth of today? The value of clothes! Ahh, how I revel only in my desire to look pretty. What a wonderful message to send. No wonder I see clones of this doll strutting pointlessly around my movie theaters.
4.) Little Mommy
Well, now that we’ve gotten the clothing/fashion stereotype out of the way, let’s move on to the other one: playing mommy. I understand; there are so many baby doll toys so that the little girl can be like her mommy and feel grown up like her mommy by taking care of a young one. But the daddy does that too, and you don’t see any baby toys geared toward little boys; that’s because taking care of a child has always been associated with the mother. Rightly so, to some degree, given that she births the damn thing, but it also contributes to that detrimental idea that all women have that motherly instinct and are expected to have and care for a child. This is why I like the musical instrument toys, or just regular looking dolls and stuffed animals that inspire you to be creative and imaginative (I always made up stories for my animals and dolls) and not pigeonhole you into a standard set specifically for your gender. Just like the Baby Born dolls (which are incredibly creepy, by the way; why the hell do you want a toy that could potentially pee on you), these Little Mommy Bath Baby dolls set up the notion of motherhood at a very young age, which I don’t think is a particularly good thing.
Again, I have absolutely nothing against children or motherhood, just like I don’t have anything against fashion or makeup or anything these dolls seem to advocate as a general rule. If you grow up and decide that you’re interested in having children; good for you. If you get into high school or college and discover that clothing and fashion is something that really interests you, I genuinely think that’s terrific. If you really enjoy wearing lots of makeup because you, as an individual, find it complimentary, knock yourself out. But why, I am compelled to ask, do toy manufacturers pump out doll after electronic device after plaything that only promote things that are stereotypically “womanly”? And why do we instill this notion of motherhood at such a young age? Isn’t that something that it’s generally a good idea to wait on? Being excited to be a parent is all well and good, but I really don’t think you should be encouraged to be pumped about it when you’re twelve.
5.) My Scene Fab Faces
Oh wait, just kidding, we’re not past the fashion bullshit yet. “The My Scene Fab Faces dolls are living the most fab, glamorous teenage life! Each doll has an, innovative, one-of-a-kind movable face feature that allows girls to create five different expressions on the dolls' faces: from frowns to smirks and smiles! Each doll comes with a super glam, ultra stylish lace and glitter dress and her outfit is topped off with accessories no diva can live without: a furry boa, a sparkling tiara, and glittering jewelry!”
Cool, so we only have five facial expressions as women.
Awesome, because teenage life is “fab” and “glamorous”
Right, because every girl I know has a furry boa, a sparkling tiara and glittering jewelry and they would literally die if they didn’t have those items in their possession.
Accurate, because I and all of my friends are super glam and ultra stylish.
Jesus. Just give these kids a book.
